Folks, I finally watched the National Geographic Special which aired on...(hold on a minute while I look it up)...JUNE! June? That long ago? Anyway, it wasn't as bad as I thought it was going to be. It was heartwrenching at parts and I did get very emotional and cry a bit, but really it was just so darn interesting. I may try to buy a copy of it to keep for our daughter as I think at some point it will be very interesting to her and a good starting point for some talking.
The part that really gets me is the part where all of the adoptive parents are waiting in the little room all together, waiting to meet their children. It hits me like a ton of bricks every single time that I see that scene. Or a similar scene. Or read about. Or think about it.
I've actually lived it, to a point. Twice K. and I were privileged to wait in a room full of people including my sister and her husband and watch as they were introduced to their son and later their daughter. It is a breathless moment to be sure. And the joy that enters that room along with the baby is palpable. There are gasps and tears and clapping and happiness and cooing and all sorts of good things. It is something to remember forever.
I try my darndest to imagine myself and K. in that room, with all of the noise and confusion and strangeness and uncomfortableness and impatience and fear and longing and hope, and I can't. It's something you can't hold until you are there, in the moment. I think you prepare for it as best you can and then you just get through it the best you can. And you really don't care about any of that stuff anyway because at the end you have your daughter and who really cares about the rest of that stuff anyway?
Side Note:
I really do want to have a video of it, but it would be K. videoing and he says he wants to be concentrating on her and not on the camera. I think back to my wedding day and how it is all a complete BLUR with silly little moments standing out clearly (like the bird trying to eat my hair and the bad Thai food when it was all over) and I want to remember the day as best as I can and the video would really help with all that. For a brief time I thought that my cousins perhaps could be present and they could video while we met our little girl, but alas that is not going to happen. So I don't know what we will do. Perhaps it is best left to the memory, and the apocryphal stories that will grow up around our own personal Gotcha Day.