grrlTravels

the definition of free seems wobbly

A week ago Friday K. and I decided to redeem our free vouchers for 4 plane tickets to the Caribbean. Generally I am not a "free" person. I never click on the free giftcard for Walmart spam. I do not consider having a salesman who looks like a lounge singer and smells like chronic halitosis berate me into buying time at the world's best investment of a vacation community to be a "free" trip. Free seems to me to be bandied about in a most alarming manner these days. But the plane tickets, they seemed like they might actually be free.

We were squashed in the airport in Puerto Rico. The airport on cruise ship day is three sizes too small. I reflected on sardines, though I think I'd prefer to be a kippered herring. More glamorous. We squashed ourselves here and we squashed ourselves there. I tried to get a shot which conveyed the sense of claustrophobia, but sans a ladder all I got was feet. Lots and lots and lots of feet.

Not only was every single flight leaving late, they were all overbooked. Seriously overbooked. Each gate successively began making wheedling announcements. $100 voucher. $200 voucher. Free ticket voucher.

K. looked at me. Generally the children would preclude any thoughts of accepting. 4 extra hours in the airport for free tickets? I don't know what it was that day—alignment of the planets, heat hangover, the desire to hang on to vacation for a bit longer. Whatever the reason I gave K. the go-ahead and he snaked his way over to talk to the agents.

It must have been our lucky day because we were chosen for the first class seats and the free tickets. I was not prepared to wiggle around like a fish packed in oil for 4 hours first class seats notwithstanding so I cajoled and begged and expounded and reasoned and pleaded most unbecomingly with K. and we ended up with a room at the Best Western in the airport.

Not only was it ridiculously expensive, it was dismal. It looked over a series of rooftops. It was brown brown brown. The carpet had memories of vomit, the linens of other bodily functions. It had a tiny flat screen tv mounted on the longest, dullest, brownest wall I have ever seen in a hotel room. And it was all ours.

We spread out. We plumped the pillows. We plugged things in. We used the toilet in a most definitive way. Everyone but me napped. I was quite pleased with myself. And when the time came we checked out and sauntered down to the gate to find that our flight was delayed for another hour. We clutched the vouchers in our hands and thought of another trip to a sunny, happy place.

We were still thinking sunny and happy last weekend. We chose dates. We settled on an island. We found a house to rent. And we called the airlines. As usual we were planning on leaving on Thanksgiving day, historically a light day for the airlines. We did not foresee any issues. Psychics we are not.

K. cajoled and begged and expounded and reasoned and pleaded most unbecomingly and we did get our tickets. For $600. Those tickets might be emancipated, they might enjoy personal rights such as an ephemeral slip of paper might enjoy, and they might be unobstructed, independent, politically autonomous, unoccupied, exempt, immune, unimpeded, unattached, and unstinted. But they weren't free.

Posted by grrlTravels at November 1, 2007 9:37 PM