See also Bibliography: Children's Books
See also Bibliography: DVDs and Videos
One of the ways I deal with stress is to start reading like a mad woman. Since I am feeling a wee bit of stress going through this adoption process, I have been reading as much as I can get my hands on and have time for. I'm going to list the books here along with my thoughts on them.
Daughter from Afar
Woodard, Sarah. Daughter from Afar: A Family's International Adoption Story. Writers Club Press, 2002.
Simply one couple's journey to adopt from China. I feel that it gives a good overview of the process, including the travel to China. Sarah Woodard is honest about her feeling and experiences adopting and I found her honesty helpful. Recommended for those just beginning the paperchase or considering adoption from China.
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Dim Sum Bagels, and Grits
Alperson, Myra. Dim Sum, Bagels, and Grits: A Sourcebook for Multicultural Families. New York: Farrar, Straus and Giroux, 2001.
Required for our home study. This book is an easy read, and its comforting tone makes you want to keep reading. It's not that the important issues are not addressed, and not that dissenting opinions are not expressed, but with an air of hopefulness and an affirmation of each individual family this book stays optimistic throughout. Two big positives for me: the text is permeated with the voices of many adoptive parents and adult adoptees who share small bits of their lives with the reader; and a lengthy (but by no means comprehensive) Resources section is included at the end of the book.
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The Exact Same Moon
Laskas, Jeanne Marie. The Exact Same Moon: Fifty Acres and a Family. New York: Bantam Books, 2003.
This is not specifically a book about adopting from China. This book is a follow up to a book I had just read and enjoyed very much, Fifty Acres and a Poodle: A Story of Love, Livestock, and Finding Myself on a Farm. So when I saw this book in the bookstore, I was so excited to read it that I bought it in hardcopy, which I am generally way too cheap to do. So I start reading along, and suddenly I realize that not only is Jeanne Marie Laskas thinking about adopting, but from China! Both of these books are funny, heartfelt, and real. Highly recommended if you're interested in a book in which the protagonist just happens to adopt a little girl from China as a part of her life journey.
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International Adoption
Tepper, Thais, Lois Hannon, and Dorothy Sandstrom, Eds. International Adoption: Challenges and Opportunities. Meadowlands, PA: Parent Network for the Post-Institutionalized Child, 1999.
Required for our home study. I have taken to thinking of this as "The Scary Book". If I were to choose the title for this book I would have called it "International Adoption: Challenges" and left it at that. Academic in tone, this spiral bound book contains 13 essays which appear to be scholarly studies which have been rewritten for a lay audience. They cover the medical and emotional challenges that are faced by children who have spent part of their life in an orphanage. Many of the articles focus primarily on Eastern Europe and the former USSR. Recommended for those considering adoption from Eastern Europe and the former USSR; background reading for those considering adopting a child from an institution.
More info on Tapestry Books
The Lost Daughters of China
Evans, Karin. The Lost Daughters of China: Abandoned Girls, Their Journey to America, and the Search for a Missing Past. New York: J. P. Tarcher, 2000.
What a lovely book this. I'm certainly not the first to discover it--this book is well known in adoption circles, recommended everywhere, and my copy says "NATIONAL BESTSELLER" across the top. But it is still a lovely book. The story of the author's journey to China to adopt her daughter is interwoven with the Chinese history, culture, and political climate which brought about the epidemic of "lost girls". It has much of the same information regarding the girls' pasts as does Wanting a Daughter, Needing a Son, but supplied in a very different format. I find the two books to be complementary and indispensible for parents of Chinese daughters and adoptive parents in general.
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A Passage to the Heart
Klatzkin, Amy, ed. A Passage to the Heart: Writings from Families with Children from China. St. Paul, MN: Yeong & Yeong, 1999.
I'll be honest with you. Halfway through this book I started wondering if international adoption was indeed for me. This book is a compilation of articles from various newsletters created by the Families with Children from China network. As such, most of the articles are short (2-4 pages in length) and the book moves quickly. It covers everything from choosing an agency to raising the child. Many of the pitfalls are right there in black and white for you to read about. Although it concentrates on what I would term "negative experiences" it also gives the prospective adoptive parent a lot of information and forces you to consider things you may not have thought about previously. Overall, I found it to be a helpful book, the majority of the articles being written by adoptive parents for other adoptive parents. You may want to read this one before you choose your agency and begin your paperwork. One last thought--many of the articles are older, and I believe that some of the processes and issues have changed since the early 90s.
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Wanting a Daughter, Needing a Son
Johnson, Kay Ann. Wanting a Daughter, Needing a Son: Abandonment, Adoption, and Orphanage Care in China. St. Paul, MN: Yeong & Yeong, 2004.
This book was written by an academic and is very academic in tone. The chapters were written separately as scholarly articles and are somewhat repetitive. That said, this book provides information and statistics not available elsewhere. I found it interesting and helpful in understanding the hows and whys of adopting girls from China. The most compelling bit of information which I gleaned from this book is that many of the girls adopted from China have older sisters. Intellectually satisfying and emotionally wrenching, this will be a book you turn to when your daughter (or son) is older and is looking for answers.
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Raising Adopted Children
Melina, Lois Ruskai. Raising Adopted Children: Practical Reassuring Advice for Every Adoptive Parent. New York: Quill, 1998.
Required for our home study. This book is practical, but I'd take exception to the term reassuring. Also, generally not the type of book that I would just sit down and read cover to cover if not required by my home study agency. It covers adoption broadly and does a good job of covering the topic while giving just enough detail in most cases. Some topics are simply mentioned while others are covered in more depth. Infertility is worked into many of the chapters. I will refer to this in years to come as we progress through the various stages of our children's lives. Recommended as a good overview and starting point.
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Good Luck Life
Gong, Rosemary. Good Luck Life: The Essential Guide to Chinese American Celebrations and Culture. New York: HarperCollins, 2005.
This book sounded very interesting—a description of the way Chinese Americans celebrate the traditional Chinese holidays. And I did find it informative, if a little basic in its treatment of Chinese culture. It does give a good overview of the major Chinese holidays as well as special occasions including weddings, baby showers, big birthdays, funerals, and table etiquette. I will use this book as a reference when the holidays roll around.
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River Town
Hessler, Peter. River Town: Two Years on the Yangtze. New York: Perennial, 2001.
I love travel books. LOVE THEM. If I can't be traveling, I'm happy to read about other people traveling. So I was browsing in the travel section of B&N and saw a book on China. Wouldn't have been interested before, but now with the adoption in progress, I'm very interested. This book gives a good idea of what life is like in China in a smaller city in the middle of the country. It's fascinating, and Peter Hessler is a good story teller. He is honest, respectful, and fair. I'd recommend reading this book to learn what life is like in China in the 21st century. Also see "Lost Treasures of the Yangtze Valley" below.
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China (Eyewitness Travel Guides)
Dk Travel Writers. China (Eyewitness Travel Guides). New York: Dorling Kindersley Publishings, 2005.
This is scheduled to be published in August. Bummer, because I really like these books but I'm hoping that in August we will be IN CHINA. We'll buy it later for our next trip. These books are a little pricey, but worth it. (Can you say eye candy?)
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Insight Guide China
Rutherford, Scott. Insight Guide China. Maspeth, NY: Langenscheidt Publishers, 2002.
We've got this one at home and are starting to go through it.
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Lonely Planet China
Damian, Harper, et. al. Lonely Planet China. Oakland, CA: Lonely Planet Publications, 2002.
On order from Amazon.
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Rough Guide to China 3
Rough Guides. Rough Guide to China 3. New York: Rough Guides, 2003.
On order from Amazon. I highly recommend the Rough Guide series of guidebooks. I have taken their advice many times and they have always been accurate. The Rough Guides are not afraid to tell you when something is better missed or a true tourist trap.
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Are Those Kids Yours?
Register, Cheri. Are Those Kids Yours?: American Families With Children Adopted From Other Countries. New York: Free Press, 1990.
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Asian American Dreams
Zia, Helen. Asian American Dreams: The Emergence of an American People. New York: Farrar, Straus and Giroux, 2001.
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Attaching in Adoption
Gray, Deborah D. Attaching in Adoption: Practical Tools for Today's Parents. Indianapolis, IN: Perspectives Press, 2002.
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Chasing the Dragon
Rowan, Roy. Chasing the Dragon: Veteran Journalist's Firsthand Account of the 1949 Chinese Revolution. Guilford, Connecticut: The Lyons Press, 2004.
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The Chinese in America
Chang, Iris. The Chinese in America: A Narrative History. New York: Penguin Books, 2004.
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Does Anybody Else Look Like Me?
Nakazawa, Donna Jackson. Does Anybody Else Look Like Me?: A Parent's Guide to Raising Multiracial Children. New York: Da Capo Press, 2004.
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Eyewitness: Ancient China
Cotterel, Arthur. Eyewitness: Ancient China. New York: DK Children, 2000.
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Half and Half
O'Hearn, Claudine C. Half and Half: Writers on Growing Up Biracial and Bicultural. New York: Pantheon, 1998.
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Intercountry Adoption from China
Rojewski, Jay W. and Jacy L. Rojewski. Intercountry Adoption from China: Examining Cultural Heritage and Other Postadoption Issues. South Hadley, Massachusetts: Bergin & Garvey Paperback, 2001.
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The Language of Blood
Trenka, Jane Jeong. The Language of Blood: A Memoir. St Paul, MN: Borealis Books, 2003.
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Melanie and Me
Garlock, Terry L. Melanie and Me: A Chinese Daughter Transforms Her Adoptive Dad. Philadelphia, PA: Xlibris Corporation, 2001.
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Moonbeams, Dumplings & Dragon Boats
Simonds, Nina, et. al. Moonbeams, Dumplings & Dragon Boats: Treasury of Chinese Holiday Tales, Activities & Recipes. New York: Gulliver Books, 2002.
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Real Parents, Real Children
Van Gulden, Holly. Real Parents, Real Children: Parenting the Adopted Child. New York: Crossroad Publishing Company, 1995.
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Red Eggs and Dragon Boats
Stepanchuk, Carol. Red Eggs and Dragon Boats: Celebrating Chinese Festivals. Pacific View PR, 1994.
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The River at the Center of the World
Winchester, Simon. The River at the Center of the World: A Journey Up the Yangtze, and Back in Chinese Time. London: Picador, 2004.
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Shared Fate
Kirk, H. David. Shared Fate: A Theory and Method of Adoptive Relationships. Brentwood Bay, BC: Ben-Simon Publications, 1984.
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A Single Square Picture
Robinson, Katy. A Single Square Picture: Korean Adoptee's Search for Her Roots. New York: Berkley Publishing Group, 2002.
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Talking with Young Children about Adoption
Watkins, Mary and Susan Fisher. Talking with Young Children about Adoption. New Haven, Connecticut: Yale University Press, 1995.
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Twenty Things Adopted Kids Wish Their Adoptive Parents Knew
Eldridge, Sherrie. Twenty Things Adopted Kids Wish Their Adoptive Parents Knew. Los Alamitos, CA: Delta, 1999.
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Voices from Another Place
Cox, Susan Soon-Keum. Voices from Another Place: Collection of Works from a Generation Born in Korea and Adopted to Other Countries. St Paul, MN: Yeong & Yeong Book Company, 1999.
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West Meets East
Tessler, Richard, Gail Gamache, and Liming Liu. West Meets East: American Adopt Chinese Children. South Hadley, Massachusetts: Bergin & Garvey Paperback, 1999.
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Wuhu Diary
Prager, Emily. Wuhu Diary: On Taking My Adopted Daughter Back to Her Hometown in China. New York: Anchor, 2002.
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